As a first-year, there are a whole lot of new things coming at you fast: living away from home, figuring out which dining hall to eat at and trying to keep your course work under control.
When you’re in this whirlwind trying to figure out an effective path for the next four years, it honestly really sucks not knowing where you want the path to go.
The fat question, “What’s your ma- jor?” has come and gone thousands of times in the past weeks, and I’m running out of ways to say, “I have no goddamn idea.”
Being an indecisive person makes it incredibly challenging to decide what you want to do for the rest of your life, and that is what choosing a major means to me.
Declaring a major feels like choosing a college all over again; it’ll eventually decide where I live, what job I have, in- come, all that jazz.
I’m not looking to be a billionaire, but I want to be successful. I want to do what makes me happy and achieve the “never work a day in your life” feeling.
So does that mean I work towards a spot at Buzzfeed, maybe CBS or do I become a therapist and start a career in research? Maybe I want to be a chef.
The amount of cluelessness I hold is pretty alarming and is what I blame for setting me back from this whole decision thing.
It feels like – and certainly is – a decision that sits on everyone’s shoulders individually. Because at the end of the day, we are all in the driver’s seat of our own lives and have the liberty to take whatever path we want. As great and awesome as that is, it’s also incredibly daunting.
I’m very aware of all the opportunities we have at Denison and the resources available to us when we feel that we are struggling, but it’s our job as students to make it all happen.
I know I’m shining a bit of a negative light on our personal liberties, and that’s really not my intention.
All I’m trying to get at is that the un- known is terrifying, and I know I can’t be the only kid here that feels the same.
With each passing day I feel a decision deadline creeping up. I can’t help but get distracted in class over thoughts like, “is this what I want to do with my life?” and, “what classes should I look into taking next semester? What’ll make me look good on a resume?”
My mind is working at a pace focused on four years from now instead of just taking a minute to slow down, focus on and enjoy the present.
This is college, the best years of our lives! Right? I’m excited for what’s to come – trust me, I am – but can’t help feeling strung over an abyss until I have an answer to that goddamn question, “What’s your major?”
However, as stressful as this whole topic may seem, it’s important to re- member that what’s meant to be will be. I’m the type of person who wants to skip the practice and be good right away, which just isn’t the way of the world.
Hard work, patience and an open mind are the tools you need to take you far. With time I trust this whole major blur will work itself out, and soon me and other undecided students will be well on our way.