Isa Abbott, Opinion Editor
“I pledge allegiance to the flag of the United States of America and to the Republic, for which it stands, one nation, under god, indivisible, for liberty and justice for all.” Every day in my white, conservative high school, the pledge of allegiance was chanted through the halls at exactly 7:30 a.m. As a newly transferred student, I was not used to students actually standing for the pledge, as most students at my old school would just talk through it or scroll on their phones.
There I sat, my hands in my lap and my back against my stiff desk chair, as everyone else stood, their hand on their heart. It was at this moment that I began to feel an intense wave of isolation and fear of what other people would think of me. It was as though everyone else was 10 feet taller, looking directly down at me, judging me. My teachers would take notice of my absence in standing for the pledge, and they would call me out in class, directly shaming me for my decision.
Though others judged me heavily for my “controversial” decision to sit for the pledge, I believe it to be appropriate to stand for the pledge only when we are truly free and one nation. But we are not. So I sat in my chair every morning at 7:30 a.m., facing the stares and the whispers and staring off into space, taking in every ounce of discomfort until the unsettling chants of “for liberty and justice for all” subsided into the distance and my ears rang with silence.
clap, claP, clAP, cLAP, cLAP, CLAP. My ears come back into focus and the ringing noise enhances as I sit in the pew of Swasey Chapel. I come to feel the same sense of discomfort as I did when I was in high school. Everyone surrounding me made me feel small again: standing, cheering and clapping for the former Vice President Mike Pence. But I was not. My eyes that were once focused on nothing darted back to the front of the chapel, Pence sitting down a few feet in front of me on a stage.
“Why am I even here?” I asked myself for the thousandth time. I told myself I would come to the Babcock Lecture Series for Pence because I wanted to know more about conservative political thought, but as I was in the thick of it, I was unsure.
At my induction ceremony as a first-year at Denison, I remember one clear thing that President Adam Weinberg told the class of 2028, and probably many others: push yourself to try new things, even when they are uncomfortable. I remind myself of this every time I push myself to do something uncomfortable on campus because I know what comes into my life and during my college experience is supposed to happen and will allow me to grow. I know that I should always take advantage of every opportunity Denison provides me with, as there are so many. So I took my opportunity to do something I thought may really bring discomfort to me, but would push me to be a more open listener and thinker. And what better way to do it than to go see Mike Pence as a Hoosier who grew up in a Christian household of two pastors.
One of the first things that was established during the lecture was that Pence is first a Christian, then a conservative and then a Republican. He said that his conservatism essentially started in the church, and it seemed to be a pretty large foundation for his beliefs. He quoted many Bible verses and went through the lecture with Christian ideology.
As a daughter of pastors who also grew up going to church, I think there is a distinct difference between conservatism and Christianity and I do not believe conservatism can stem from Christianity, but rather stems from an environment of fear. Pence said that, to him, conservatism is about conserving values, traditions and history. Though I, myself, am not Christian, as someone who has grown up in a household of pastors who went to Princeton Seminary for a master’s degree in this topic, I have been educated in Christianity enough to know that it is far from a conservative teaching. It is about learning from others, welcoming others, loving others, giving people grace and appreciation of new ideas and values. It is about welcoming everything that comes into our lives with kindness, rather than feeding into the guilt and pressing need to conserve beliefs, traditions and religion onto others.
In a conversation with my mom last summer, we discussed the reality of those who grew up in a conservative church. My mom grew up in a Baptist church, where she told me many people experienced this sense of heavy guilt and grief if they could not prove to others that their religion was the only true one, and it would save their life. If someone did not conform to that religion, the person in the church would carry that grief and guilt with them for the rest of their lives, feeling as though it was their fault that they are going to “go to hell.” This, I believe, is the harmful and fearmongering community that many churches in America hold themselves to, and it is sad.
Not to psychoanalyze him, but I see this guilt and grief in Pence when he spoke so adamantly about his faith and continued to try and prove himself and his Christianity to the crowd: that conservatism and the church can save and move young people. Conservatism has no ties to Christianity, but only the sad belief that is embedded into people’s minds that if they do something against what their denomination or individual church believes, they will go to hell. And if anyone else does not follow that same value, then they are going to hell as well. It is about conserving their own unconscious fears, not about moving and evolving through life with an open mind and kindness.
Pence also said that being conservative means to be respectful and live by civility. Correct me if I’m wrong, but I’m pretty sure conservatives bombing Iran, taking the leader of Venezuela and trying to buy Greenland is not a very respectful or civil approach to politics. In fact, Pence himself said he wished he could buy Greenland and just “get out the credit card.” Wow. There is certainly a difference between being respectful and civil and then proclaiming harmful, insulting and insensitive jokes about other countries, as well as trying to take over those countries. In fact, Pence even suggested that Iran, for example, is not in control of their own country, as though the United States was. He said what is happening now between the U.S. and Iran and a ceasefire will let Iran “reclaim their nation,” and that he believes we should let the military do its job, whatever that means. Here, he is not recognizing Iran as a country of its own, but rather a country that is currently run by the United States and its military.
One of the other things that stood out to me was when he discussed the national debt. He said, “the most pressing issue of America right now is the national debt…and no one is talking about it.” The most pressing issue of America right now is, in fact, not our national debt, but our democratic backsliding. Within a year, we became an electoral democracy, backsliding quicker than nearly any other country in the world from a liberal democracy. The national debt is definitely a problem and does impact a lot of policy, but it is truly our current threat to democracy that is most pressing; and everyone is talking about it, because it matters.
In this same half of the lecture, Pence mentioned budgetary issues, such as medicaid and medicare being 80% of the U.S. budget. According to the Center on Budget and Policy Priorities, these programs make up only 24% of the federal budget. This is a fairly large percentage, but these programs protect millions of people’s lives and are necessary. He alludes to the idea that if we want to do one thing, we cannot because we cannot touch 80% of the budget, and so those goals are impossible to achieve. He suggests that we could restrict the funding of the 80% for medicare and medicaid, or we could increase taxes. He adds that increasing taxes would limit young people and limiting the government funded programs would ensure that only the people who truly need it the most will receive it. This is one of the many arguments for the “Big Beautiful Bill,” or H.R.1. These cuts to healthcare funding in the bill that recently passed this summer will create tons of deaths per year and make it ten times harder to receive the financial coverage and healthcare citizens need.
However, the one thing I most enjoyed hearing about was Jan. 6. I really liked his answers to that, and I feel as though it was a slightly emotional part of the lecture. He said that he felt he did what he had to do because the presidency belongs to the American people, and the American people alone. Although defending democracy and the American people’s votes was the bare minimum, I do think in the age of Trump, it would be harder to do so. Trump is such a harmful and powerful figure, and for someone to stand up to him on such a violent and dangerous day is great. Jan. 6 was a terrible day, and I am grateful I got to hear his view on it. I cannot imagine how traumatic it was to be threatened to be hung for standing up for democracy, and I do not believe violence is the answer to our disagreements.
When I was at my freshman induction ceremony, I did not think President Weinberg’s encouragement to try new things would lead me to hearing what former Vice President Mike Pence had to say about conservatism. Though I disagree with almost everything Mike Pence stands for, I believe this lecture opened my eyes to why some conservatives think the way they do. I also think it allowed me to reflect on how important my future career is as someone who is considering becoming a politician.
There are so many harmful and faithless policies that are passed everyday by white men who claim to be “Christian” and conservative. However, I think it isn’t about their “faith” or traditional values, but about conserving what benefits them and restricting minorities so that white men will never have to feel the same discrimination and pain that they have caused others. Yes, this lecture series was uncomfortable for me to sit through and hard for me to hear, but it continued to spark a passion in why I’m studying politics and why I want a career in it. I am hopeful that one day the United States will lead with kindness and compassion for others instead of hurting people and our democracy, and calling it “Christianity.” Maybe then it’ll give myself and others something to stand for. Something to recognize as a united nation. Something I won’t be embarrassed to be a part of.
Isa Abbott ‘28 is a politics and public affairs major from Indianapolis, Indiana.